Category: Unnie Thoughts

Unnie Thoughts: Self Love is a Continuous Process

It’s no secret that the generation today is in need of a healthy validation that assures them their feelings are valid. I, myself, have read a lot of self-help and self-love books that at first, I wasn’t sure if I ought to be proud of it because I thought, “What if people think I’m depressed?” But as I learned when talking to different people and reading more and more books, you can be an okay person and still find yourself looking for advice every now and then— a voice aside from the people that you know. Maybe even constantly if you need it.

I try to apply and preach self-love whenever I can, but don’t you ever get those random days when you just feel a little sad? One minute you feel on top of the world, and the next, your self-esteem and confidence shoots down like a popped balloon. Do we simply just think too much sometimes or do we need to stop feeding our minds with doubts and just tackle our days for what is is? Our mind is a powerful tool that can either break us or help us get back to a path of healing and recovery. We need to practice feeding ourselves with positive thoughts, “we can do this” mantras, and if the weight of our problems are just a bit too heavy to carry… let’s remind ourselves that it’s okay to rest.

There have been countless of times where this up and down swirl of emotions have latched onto me and I’m not really sure how I get out of the rut. I think that we just need to live our life day by day and eventually, when we find ourselves doing something else, the feeling of loneliness and anxiety just dissipates. Spending time with family, talking or going out with loved ones, working hard, solving problems, sleeping in on the weekends — life will not let us be stuck on a downward spiral forever. Our situations won’t change overnight though but we can heal in between the hardships if we allow ourselves to.

It’s almost the end of another year, 2019, and when I look back on all my experiences, I can’t say I’ve had a bad one. Don’t self sabotage by allowing your mind to wander endlessly through a loop of insecurities. Just like Rome wasn’t built in a day, trust that the life you have been living, shaped by your own hands and heart, amidst the negative energy, has a sturdy and good foundation

Unnie Thoughts: Being Emotionally Present in the Moment

In a couple of days, I’ll be going on vacation, but as it turns out it’s the Chuseok holiday (Thanksgiving) in Korea so there’s no Rookie Historian: Goo Hae Ryung this week for me to recap regardless😅 I rarely do life updates here but if I can, it’s because I want to share some knowledge or realizations I’ve learned as of the moment.

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Have you ever experienced being physically present in the moment but your mind wanders elsewhere? When you’re out to dinner with friends or having a family get-together, you know and hear what other people are talking about, but you yourself check out into your own thoughts?

A stark example of this is when I fixate trying to get the perfect angle of a dish ordered from a restaurant or making sure a scenery is breathtaking enough when captured to post in Instagram. We are a social media driven generation and I admit that it’s fun being able to share and relive my life through photographs — but the time I spend obsessing about these little things sometimes takes away the thankfulness or happiness I feel in enjoying such a moment. Instead of the memory of travelling to a new place or relishing the experience of hanging out with loved ones, the moment I remember first is how a picture didn’t turn out the way I wanted it to or how I was thinking about a particular problem at the time.

I’ve been trying to cultivate the habit of being more emotionally present in each moment because I’ve realized that I’ve been missing out on truly enjoying experiences, small or big. This doesn’t mean that I don’t find joy in my daily life but I find myself more engaged and satisfied when I focus on the present and listen to the people I’m currently with. Whether it’s travelling to a new place or meeting my friends, I feel a more purposeful experience because I know that I was 100% physically and emotionally available for such an experience.

Our concerns are valid, yes, but as I’ve learned throughout the days, not everything we feel is necessarily true. When we’re with our family or friends, lets make it a point to listen to their stories, share our insights, and laugh the time away. Let’s take a breath and give ourselves a “me time” in a day where we can process our thoughts and musings. Then let go of all the weight and know that you’ve done what you can to help yourself. Don’t forget to cut yourself some slack and take time to relax💆🏻‍♀️ Be emotionally available to yourselves first and the act of being mindful towards our loved ones and surroundings will naturally follow💖

Unnie Thoughts: Trust the Timing of Your Life

There are instances in my life where I wanted something to happen at one point in time but it didn’t, so I accepted my fate that it just wasn’t meant to be. A few months or even a few years later, while having a random musing, I realized that what I wanted to happen in the past has actually happened now. Is it a coincidence, hard work, or ordained from above? Perhaps it’s a mixture of all 3 elements with a spark of magic. 

It’s funny when the realization hits me because we can get the things we want but it’s not always on the timing that we desire. I didn’t specifically ask for it to happen but somehow it did, and I always agree with the timing of when it happened. I believe though that such experiences, whether it’s getting your dream job, passing an important exam, or being able to buy cheap airfare tickets to go to your dream destination, will happen if it’s meant to happen for you. Not everything turns out the way we want them to (And that’s not a bad thing) — we could actually want something different from our initial desires, make mistakes, realize that taking an alternative isn’t so bad as we thought. As with the passage of time can instil life changing lessons that we never thought we could learn, perhaps letting things come to fruition on its own accord is the very thing we must embrace.

Lately I’ve been struggling with trying to do something, anything really, to achieve certain goals I have in my life at the moment. I don’t want to whine and complain about something that I haven’t even made any effort to achieve. It gets frustrating though because if I know that I’ve already exerted time and energy to achieve my goals but my desired outcome still hasn’t happened, then what does become of me then? Is it my fault for not doing enough, should I try harder?  

With this post, I just want to remind myself (and if you need some encouraging yourselves) that the things we want to happen may not occur immediately but it doesn’t mean that it won’t happen. Having moments of panic and getting scared is normal but don’t let it eat you alive. I tell myself that these times of uncertainty will come to pass too — we just can’t force it. I’m not saying to just do nothing, heck no, exert effort and do something to attain your desires and goals. Remember to be patient with yourself and the universe — if it takes time for us to accomplish what we want, then the forces of the universe must also need time to help us get where we want and need to be.

Friendships, new experiences, and unexpected discoveries can happen organically if we let it, maybe even when we least expect it. Don’t try to control an outcome and continue to live your life one day a time, well and fully. Trust that the timing of your life is already where it needs to be at each moment, growing and developing dynamically just like you. 

Unnie Thoughts: Don’t be afraid to live your best, hard earned life

Unnie Thoughts: Don’t be afraid to live your best, hard earned life

This 2019, I found myself enjoying reading self-help books more than novels. Each page tells a story on how to approach life with a wisdom that we secretly know but never get to fully apply in our lives. Mental health has become a growing concern in today’s society and getting advice or having someone tell you what you can do to survive is helpful. Whether or not we follow the advice is up to us but having someone narrate steps or explain the process is reassuring that I’m not the only one going through something alone.

If there’s anything I’ve learned from the books I’ve read, it’s that it’s okay to enjoy your life. Don’t feel bad for living your best life — there’s nothing wrong in being content and happy with your everyday. But why is it so hard to feel this way sometimes? Because while we get to work a stable job, have a good family to come home to, travel once in awhile.. others are suffering. There’s this guilt that eats us up for being able to enjoy while even other people around us are struggling. Or we tend to look at the lives of other people and go down the rabbit hole of jealousy & insecurity, we stop & rethink if we are indeed living the best life we can have.

But it’s not their fault that they live that way. Nor is it ours that we have a different life. We can make assumptions and think that the grass is greener on the other side but do we really know the hard work and sacrifices that went into the grass to become healthy and full of life? Let’s not feel bad about our choices & lifestyle and learn to embrace that what we currently (and can) have is enjoyment in its purest form already.

Here’s the thing though: Enjoying life’s fruits doesn’t mean it’s an easy breezy experience. Earning money takes hard work, exercising is a chore, and travelling means waking up early and doing a lot of walking to soak in the sights (Except for staycations, depends on your IT) and requires money to spend. Maintaining friendships and having good relations with your parents/siblings develops over time. A good life means working through problems and exerting thought & effort to live a balanced lifestyle. There’s no shortcuts and as we experience the opposite of anything easy, the lessons and hardships will make us wiser and improve our lives. If we allow it, and we should.

I’m slowly trying to unlearn the notion of guilt and stripping away the care and attention I give to jealousy. When I look at other people’s social media feeds or hear their success stories, I admit that the emotions can bubble up and eat me alive. But I always remind myself that what others have that I don’t does not make me weaker. Get rid of entitlement and own up to your strengths. Don’t we downplay our lives when other people compliment it? The same rule applies when we admire others for theirs — let’s give each other the benefit of the doubt.

To be confident and know that despite what other people say, you can still do your own thing, is hard. Don’t be afraid to be happy and live with a smile on your face because that smile can come from many different (easy & difficult) experiences. This entry doesn’t mean that I’m well on my way to achieving true happiness without falter but I’m hoping that these words will remind me that I’m doing okay. I’m not miserable and I want to start fully enjoying my life without any buts😊

Happy Unnie New Year!

Looking back on this year’s events and moments, I can say for certain that I am thankful. But don’t we always say this though? That we learn from the bad times, savor the good, and look forward to another year filled with hope, challenges, and rewards? I really can’t say anything else as this is how life progresses I guess. We go thru another 365 days hoping that this new year will impart something exciting for us.

Before 2018 officially comes to a close, let me say thank you to all the good and well, boring, korean dramas I watched this year. It has been an amazing year for TV shows and although I’m sure I missed a few good ones, the beauty remains is that I can always watch it next time. To the shows that didn’t pique my interest as much or I stopped watching midway, I’m sure you entertained other fans with your plot twists and equally meaningful life lessons. To all the crazy, powerful, and heartfelt shows I consumed this year, I’ll never forget you.

With that said, I cannot wait for all the new kdramas that will be shown in 2019! 🙂 There are already a few I’m anticipating eagerly but I’m hoping for more surprises. As I look forward, I hope to continue this blog and bring you more life lessons and kdrama recommendations to make your days just a little more fun.

It’s going to be a new year filled with exciting and life inspiring kdramas. It may exceed our expectations, or we suffer with the characters’ difficult times, perhaps we wake up diving into a new adventure just waiting for us– whatever the new year holds.. I can’t wait 🙂

Happy New Year everyone!

Merry Unnie Christmas!

2018 has been a year of changes and new adjustments in my life. I got married, moved to a new hometown, got the opportunity to travel to Europe, and learned how to cook. Not just the canned goods or scrambled eggs kind of cooking — the real stuff like porkchops, pasta, and fish!

I had a lot of ups and downs this past year as well and I know that things will never be easy, there’s always a problem just waiting to be discovered. But I have learned to be more resilient, a little less paranoid, and doing my hardest to face such adversities head on. I’m grateful for my family and friends who have shown me that we can’t avoid such challenges; we need to confront the difficult times because these experiences will make us stronger and wiser. It’s okay to make mistakes as long as we learn from them.

Kdramas this year have been so fun and thrilling I feel so much joy just spending my time watching them. I almost always finish a kdrama to the end but I admit that there have been a few shows that I stopped watching in the middle or almost immediately because either the story was too heavy or the plot was going nowhere. These shows have influenced my life wherein I can remember certain scenes or lines being said by a character and I reflect on the learnings or emotions in my present situations. It’s these murder mysteries, romantic comedies, slice of life, or supernatural forces that awaken my senses for life. I am grateful to watch other people (kdrama characters) go through their life and I, as an eager fan, grow in knowledge and realizations as well.

Enjoy the holiday season and Merry Christmas to everyone! 🙂