Category: Unnie Thoughts

Unnie Thoughts: Don’t be afraid to live your best, hard earned life

Unnie Thoughts: Don’t be afraid to live your best, hard earned life

This 2019, I found myself enjoying reading self-help books more than novels. Each page tells a story on how to approach life with a wisdom that we secretly know but never get to fully apply in our lives. Mental health has become a growing concern in today’s society and getting advice or having someone tell you what you can do to survive is helpful. Whether or not we follow the advice is up to us but having someone narrate steps or explain the process is reassuring that I’m not the only one going through something alone.

If there’s anything I’ve learned from the books I’ve read, it’s that it’s okay to enjoy your life. Don’t feel bad for living your best life — there’s nothing wrong in being content and happy with your everyday. But why is it so hard to feel this way sometimes? Because while we get to work a stable job, have a good family to come home to, travel once in awhile.. others are suffering. There’s this guilt that eats us up for being able to enjoy while even other people around us are struggling. Or we tend to look at the lives of other people and go down the rabbit hole of jealousy & insecurity, we stop & rethink if we are indeed living the best life we can have.

But it’s not their fault that they live that way. Nor is it ours that we have a different life. We can make assumptions and think that the grass is greener on the other side but do we really know the hard work and sacrifices that went into the grass to become healthy and full of life? Let’s not feel bad about our choices & lifestyle and learn to embrace that what we currently (and can) have is enjoyment in its purest form already.

Here’s the thing though: Enjoying life’s fruits doesn’t mean it’s an easy breezy experience. Earning money takes hard work, exercising is a chore, and travelling means waking up early and doing a lot of walking to soak in the sights (Except for staycations, depends on your IT) and requires money to spend. Maintaining friendships and having good relations with your parents/siblings develops over time. A good life means working through problems and exerting thought & effort to live a balanced lifestyle. There’s no shortcuts and as we experience the opposite of anything easy, the lessons and hardships will make us wiser and improve our lives. If we allow it, and we should.

I’m slowly trying to unlearn the notion of guilt and stripping away the care and attention I give to jealousy. When I look at other people’s social media feeds or hear their success stories, I admit that the emotions can bubble up and eat me alive. But I always remind myself that what others have that I don’t does not make me weaker. Get rid of entitlement and own up to your strengths. Don’t we downplay our lives when other people compliment it? The same rule applies when we admire others for theirs — let’s give each other the benefit of the doubt.

To be confident and know that despite what other people say, you can still do your own thing, is hard. Don’t be afraid to be happy and live with a smile on your face because that smile can come from many different (easy & difficult) experiences. This entry doesn’t mean that I’m well on my way to achieving true happiness without falter but I’m hoping that these words will remind me that I’m doing okay. I’m not miserable and I want to start fully enjoying my life without any buts😊

Unnie Thoughts: Self Care to NOT escape your reality

Anyeong! 🙂 Veering away from my usual korean drama posts, I wanted to share something that really got my attention. I recently came across a quote that one of my good friends posted in her Instagram story and it got me really thinking about what it means to take care of ourselves. The quote is:

True self-care is not about salt baths and chocolate cake. It is making the choice to build a life you don’t need to regularly escape from.

http://www.instagram.com/briannawiest

It was particularly striking because it was the first time that I read/heard of self-care not defined as pampering yourself or taking an hour or two to destress or escape from the mundane. I’ve always considered watching korean dramas as a form of “escape” from my real life because I don’t think about my own problems for 30 minutes – 1 hour and merely become an observer of someone else’s life. I can pry and make comments about a character’s decision, cheer for them for attaining their goals, and revel in their journey when they have conquered their plights. I started thinking that instead of treating my interest as an escape, couldn’t it just be considered a part of my life that I find enjoyable?

Personally, I don’t think there’s anything wrong with indulging ourselves at times because waking up every single day and going through the same routine can drive us crazy. But the thing is, I also don’t think that the saying above means that we’re not allowed to destress, but rather, I think it calls for a shift in perspective –– a change in mindset that instead of trying to escape the mundane, we create a life that we can enjoy on a regular basis and not need to break away from. It’s being able to deal with your life the best way you can with habits and plans that nurture yourself.

I enjoy watching korean dramas but it did reach a point where I just “had to” catch an episode because I had a stressful time at work and I deserve to unwind. Although I can argue that it’s not an extraordinary way to indulge myself, I realize that the feeling of deserving something because of an unfair situation is entitlement. I just had to buy a Starbucks drink, order take-out food, or I need to buy that luxury bag — I thought it was self-care because I felt good after treating myself. But the reasons behind those actions were just to satisfy an exhausted or entitled part of myself. Again, there is nothing wrong in treating yourself but ask yourself: How can I truly take care of myself when I’m always depending on something else to make me feel happy? Is it even happiness or just a temporary spurt of glee?

If you find yourself having to regularly indulge in consumer self-care, it’s because you are disconnected from actual self-care, which has very little to do with “treating yourself” and a whole lot do with parenting yourself and making choices for your long-term wellness.

https://thoughtcatalog.com/brianna-wiest

With so many unforeseen and unpredictable circumstances that can sprout in our lives, building a life that we can learn to be satisfied with takes time, courage, and the willingness to accept mistakes and learn from them. It’s not meant to be easy because real happiness and satisfaction stems from a mixture of good and bad experiences, and that’s okay.

I still stand by the fact making plans to travel, buy an iced coffee, or go on a shopping spree once in awhile if you feel good or just want to do such a thing. It’s the how often you do it and reason why that signals the difference of these habits being defined as true self-care or I need to do this because I am stressed. It’s different for everyone but I think that taking care of ourselves doesn’t have to involve special events or occurrences all the time. Reading a book, taking a power nap, talking with your family and friends, or watching korean dramas — simple but isn’t this what life is all about anyway? 😉

*For further reading, check out the author’s post here:

Happy Unnie New Year!

Looking back on this year’s events and moments, I can say for certain that I am thankful. But don’t we always say this though? That we learn from the bad times, savor the good, and look forward to another year filled with hope, challenges, and rewards? I really can’t say anything else as this is how life progresses I guess. We go thru another 365 days hoping that this new year will impart something exciting for us.

Before 2018 officially comes to a close, let me say thank you to all the good and well, boring, korean dramas I watched this year. It has been an amazing year for TV shows and although I’m sure I missed a few good ones, the beauty remains is that I can always watch it next time. To the shows that didn’t pique my interest as much or I stopped watching midway, I’m sure you entertained other fans with your plot twists and equally meaningful life lessons. To all the crazy, powerful, and heartfelt shows I consumed this year, I’ll never forget you.

With that said, I cannot wait for all the new kdramas that will be shown in 2019! 🙂 There are already a few I’m anticipating eagerly but I’m hoping for more surprises. As I look forward, I hope to continue this blog and bring you more life lessons and kdrama recommendations to make your days just a little more fun.

It’s going to be a new year filled with exciting and life inspiring kdramas. It may exceed our expectations, or we suffer with the characters’ difficult times, perhaps we wake up diving into a new adventure just waiting for us– whatever the new year holds.. I can’t wait 🙂

Happy New Year everyone!

Merry Unnie Christmas!

2018 has been a year of changes and new adjustments in my life. I got married, moved to a new hometown, got the opportunity to travel to Europe, and learned how to cook. Not just the canned goods or scrambled eggs kind of cooking — the real stuff like porkchops, pasta, and fish!

I had a lot of ups and downs this past year as well and I know that things will never be easy, there’s always a problem just waiting to be discovered. But I have learned to be more resilient, a little less paranoid, and doing my hardest to face such adversities head on. I’m grateful for my family and friends who have shown me that we can’t avoid such challenges; we need to confront the difficult times because these experiences will make us stronger and wiser. It’s okay to make mistakes as long as we learn from them.

Kdramas this year have been so fun and thrilling I feel so much joy just spending my time watching them. I almost always finish a kdrama to the end but I admit that there have been a few shows that I stopped watching in the middle or almost immediately because either the story was too heavy or the plot was going nowhere. These shows have influenced my life wherein I can remember certain scenes or lines being said by a character and I reflect on the learnings or emotions in my present situations. It’s these murder mysteries, romantic comedies, slice of life, or supernatural forces that awaken my senses for life. I am grateful to watch other people (kdrama characters) go through their life and I, as an eager fan, grow in knowledge and realizations as well.

Enjoy the holiday season and Merry Christmas to everyone! 🙂