Tag: anxiety

Unnie Thoughts: Self Love is a Continuous Process

It’s no secret that the generation today is in need of a healthy validation that assures them their feelings are valid. I, myself, have read a lot of self-help and self-love books that at first, I wasn’t sure if I ought to be proud of it because I thought, “What if people think I’m depressed?” But as I learned when talking to different people and reading more and more books, you can be an okay person and still find yourself looking for advice every now and then— a voice aside from the people that you know. Maybe even constantly if you need it.

I try to apply and preach self-love whenever I can, but don’t you ever get those random days when you just feel a little sad? One minute you feel on top of the world, and the next, your self-esteem and confidence shoots down like a popped balloon. Do we simply just think too much sometimes or do we need to stop feeding our minds with doubts and just tackle our days for what is is? Our mind is a powerful tool that can either break us or help us get back to a path of healing and recovery. We need to practice feeding ourselves with positive thoughts, “we can do this” mantras, and if the weight of our problems are just a bit too heavy to carry… let’s remind ourselves that it’s okay to rest.

There have been countless of times where this up and down swirl of emotions have latched onto me and I’m not really sure how I get out of the rut. I think that we just need to live our life day by day and eventually, when we find ourselves doing something else, the feeling of loneliness and anxiety just dissipates. Spending time with family, talking or going out with loved ones, working hard, solving problems, sleeping in on the weekends — life will not let us be stuck on a downward spiral forever. Our situations won’t change overnight though but we can heal in between the hardships if we allow ourselves to.

It’s almost the end of another year, 2019, and when I look back on all my experiences, I can’t say I’ve had a bad one. Don’t self sabotage by allowing your mind to wander endlessly through a loop of insecurities. Just like Rome wasn’t built in a day, trust that the life you have been living, shaped by your own hands and heart, amidst the negative energy, has a sturdy and good foundation

Unnie Thoughts: Being Emotionally Present in the Moment

In a couple of days, I’ll be going on vacation, but as it turns out it’s the Chuseok holiday (Thanksgiving) in Korea so there’s no Rookie Historian: Goo Hae Ryung this week for me to recap regardless😅 I rarely do life updates here but if I can, it’s because I want to share some knowledge or realizations I’ve learned as of the moment.

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Have you ever experienced being physically present in the moment but your mind wanders elsewhere? When you’re out to dinner with friends or having a family get-together, you know and hear what other people are talking about, but you yourself check out into your own thoughts?

A stark example of this is when I fixate trying to get the perfect angle of a dish ordered from a restaurant or making sure a scenery is breathtaking enough when captured to post in Instagram. We are a social media driven generation and I admit that it’s fun being able to share and relive my life through photographs — but the time I spend obsessing about these little things sometimes takes away the thankfulness or happiness I feel in enjoying such a moment. Instead of the memory of travelling to a new place or relishing the experience of hanging out with loved ones, the moment I remember first is how a picture didn’t turn out the way I wanted it to or how I was thinking about a particular problem at the time.

I’ve been trying to cultivate the habit of being more emotionally present in each moment because I’ve realized that I’ve been missing out on truly enjoying experiences, small or big. This doesn’t mean that I don’t find joy in my daily life but I find myself more engaged and satisfied when I focus on the present and listen to the people I’m currently with. Whether it’s travelling to a new place or meeting my friends, I feel a more purposeful experience because I know that I was 100% physically and emotionally available for such an experience.

Our concerns are valid, yes, but as I’ve learned throughout the days, not everything we feel is necessarily true. When we’re with our family or friends, lets make it a point to listen to their stories, share our insights, and laugh the time away. Let’s take a breath and give ourselves a “me time” in a day where we can process our thoughts and musings. Then let go of all the weight and know that you’ve done what you can to help yourself. Don’t forget to cut yourself some slack and take time to relax💆🏻‍♀️ Be emotionally available to yourselves first and the act of being mindful towards our loved ones and surroundings will naturally follow💖

Unnie Life Lessons: 4 Missions Accomplished in Angel’s Last Mission: Love

Are we merely fulfilling the destiny laid out for us or can we change our fates depending on our actions? Angel’s Last Mission: Love shows us that we have the power to alter our destiny but it is not without sacrifices and hardships.

The lead actress (Shin Hye Sun) and lead actor (L) were superb in this kdrama and I hope that they will be catapulted into further stardom because of this kdrama!💫 It was such a high intensity show with all the shouting, rage, and cat & mouse angles certain episodes brought. Balancing out the tense moments were the comedic chops of our angel, Kim Dan, and the subtle but growing love he shared with Yeon Seo made the show more enticing to watch.

For a brief overview of Angel’s Last Mission: Love, please read my previous post to get to know this romcom melodrama a bit better!

Unnie Life Lessons

1. Yeon Seo was able to find love and live a life overcoming her scars of losing loved ones and being unable to dance because of her blindness. She emerged a stronger and happier person because she enabled herself to do so💃🏻

  • Yeon Seo was so used to being alone and miserable she never thought about how other people might feel of her coming back and automatically getting the lead role in Giselle. She didn’t take Kim Dan’s advice like an entitled heiress but rather, she even suggested to hold an audition to be fair. It shows her willingness to compromise and work with others sincerely.

  • Although Kim Dan was highly influential to her path to recovery, it was still her choice if she wanted to listen to him. It was on her own accord to reach out to the ballet corps and sincerely compliment Ni Na of her amazing audition as Giselle. She remained temperamental and wasn’t the most approachable person around but people learned to appreciate her true nature as well.

  • It takes a lot of courage to open up and try to get along with people who clearly don’t like you. It’s not easy to think of others given what Yeon Seo has been through herself but she understood that her dreams and hopes are not hers alone; other people get upset or have the same aspirations like her. We can feel as if our own pain is the worst and most brutal compared to others but we can’t compare what we feel to another’s because we’ll never know the magnitude of what one is feeling unless we are them.

2. Our resident angel upheld good values and preached the teachings of God to practically everyone he met. Even if Kim Dan got entangled with human business and rebeled against the norm, his intentions were pure and his actions consistently reflected that of a good person.

  • Never one to be quiet about his feelings, Kim Dan said what he wanted to even if it’s toward an audience that didn’t want to hear his opinion. He told Yeon Seo what she needed to hear and fought for his mission to help her find love again. I think he also learned that humans get frustrated and fixated on things that may not make sense for his angel persona but he adapted well enough to give Yeon Seo the space she needed because she was overcoming her own fears and insecurities.

  • He saw with his own eyes how evil crept its way into Yeon Seo’s life and by falling in love with her did he start to doubt God’s grand plans for her. Angel’s Last Mission: Love imparts that it’s okay to be confused and angry with your faith — I think that only by questioning your beliefs will you slowly realize the reason and purpose of your struggles. In the end, even if we are tempted to commit a sin, we are anchored to our core values that remind us of what is right. Even when we make mistakes, our beliefs will tell us to repent and ask for forgiveness.

3. We will probably never fully comprehend the reasons why tragic events happen in our life. Not defying what is morally good despite questioning the events of our life is a sacrifice we should strive for. A better tomorrow will come even if we can’t imagine it.

  • Kim Dan felt frustrated and confused as to why he can’t save Yeon Seo because saving someone from murder is good right? But it also makes sense that as an angel, he can’t meddle with human affairs especially with matters of life and death. He almost killed Ru Na as the person responsible for Yeon Seo’s attempted murders to desperately prevent any more harm to come to her but he stopped himself because he knew that it would be a grave sin to do so.

  • I’m not saying to blindly follow a set of rules established by an invisible deity and hope that by not breaking any of them, you won’t have a hard time. Even if you don’t believe in God, you still follow a set of guidelines that tell you what is objectively right or wrong. Things happen for a reason and I believe that once we get past the confusion and pain, we’ll find this life worth living for✨

4. Yeon Seo and Kim Dan were given a miracle and can spend the rest of their lives together as human beings. They don’t know the exact reason why this was allowed and it didn’t happen immediately but this could be God’s plan for them all along.

  • Kim Dan was forgiven for his sin of falling in love with a human and remained an angel. Yeon Seo became the chairman of Fantasia and continued to live her life well despite Dan’s absence. It was then revealed that Kim Dan was allowed to be with her all this time but he was invisible to the human eye. One fateful day as Seo Yeon was contemplating on the bench where they first interacted, she was finally able to see him as his handkerchief (Identity to be an angel) disappeared.

  • We pray and hope for good things but when we experience unforseen bad moments, we clamor for the fairness and balance God claims He is. I believe that when we live diligently and trust in a higher power, God will bless us with the very thing we prayed so earnestly for or maybe something more. Miracles can happen in our lives… or it won’t. We can’t give up and let time take away our remaining days as a mortal being because even if the pain seems unbearable now, I truly believe that the feeling will pass and reasons to live will find its way to us.

We’ve always been taught that God is all knowing and that He already knows what will happen to us. Thanks to Angel’s Last Mission: Love, I’d like to believe that if change is the only constant thing in this world, then our unpredictability as humans can also move His heart, forgive us, and bring about changes in His plans for us❤️

Unnie Thoughts: Trust the Timing of Your Life

There are instances in my life where I wanted something to happen at one point in time but it didn’t, so I accepted my fate that it just wasn’t meant to be. A few months or even a few years later, while having a random musing, I realized that what I wanted to happen in the past has actually happened now. Is it a coincidence, hard work, or ordained from above? Perhaps it’s a mixture of all 3 elements with a spark of magic. 

It’s funny when the realization hits me because we can get the things we want but it’s not always on the timing that we desire. I didn’t specifically ask for it to happen but somehow it did, and I always agree with the timing of when it happened. I believe though that such experiences, whether it’s getting your dream job, passing an important exam, or being able to buy cheap airfare tickets to go to your dream destination, will happen if it’s meant to happen for you. Not everything turns out the way we want them to (And that’s not a bad thing) — we could actually want something different from our initial desires, make mistakes, realize that taking an alternative isn’t so bad as we thought. As with the passage of time can instil life changing lessons that we never thought we could learn, perhaps letting things come to fruition on its own accord is the very thing we must embrace.

Lately I’ve been struggling with trying to do something, anything really, to achieve certain goals I have in my life at the moment. I don’t want to whine and complain about something that I haven’t even made any effort to achieve. It gets frustrating though because if I know that I’ve already exerted time and energy to achieve my goals but my desired outcome still hasn’t happened, then what does become of me then? Is it my fault for not doing enough, should I try harder?  

With this post, I just want to remind myself (and if you need some encouraging yourselves) that the things we want to happen may not occur immediately but it doesn’t mean that it won’t happen. Having moments of panic and getting scared is normal but don’t let it eat you alive. I tell myself that these times of uncertainty will come to pass too — we just can’t force it. I’m not saying to just do nothing, heck no, exert effort and do something to attain your desires and goals. Remember to be patient with yourself and the universe — if it takes time for us to accomplish what we want, then the forces of the universe must also need time to help us get where we want and need to be.

Friendships, new experiences, and unexpected discoveries can happen organically if we let it, maybe even when we least expect it. Don’t try to control an outcome and continue to live your life one day a time, well and fully. Trust that the timing of your life is already where it needs to be at each moment, growing and developing dynamically just like you.